June 17, 2015
After a brief trip downtown, i struggled to walk the few blocks home from the bus. i was having chest pains and my energy level was basically nothing.
When i finally reached home, i laid down on the bed, out of breath and i could feel my heart pounding. Honestly, i was scared to fall asleep ... would i wake up?
It didn't feel like i even slept, but i got up two hours later, feeling a bit better, but still quite weak and feeling my heart pounding in my chest.
i know my time on this earth will be shorten because of my failing heart and i am tired of all the pains and betrayals thrust towards me and living with the MANY regrets i have about my past.
i can't change the past and i don't have enough time remaining to change the future, so i am just living each day and accepting what comes my way. Some deserved and some i don't deserve.
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