Some Thoughts

Devon has been in China during the last part of 2015.  i've been trying to get my leg back since the amputation in late July.  After we thought the wound had healed, the leg was returned to me twice.  But each time the wound opened up again.  Since August, i have been a shut in.  Leaving the house scares me, it's a struggle.  Except for our neighbor Anne, i really don't have any friends i can count on.  My days have been lost and wasted.

My health issues have been a heavy weight on my relationship with Devon ... and it has been unfair to him.  My questioning of our relationship has been harmful to my recovery and unfair to Devon. As i witness my decline in health, my confidence has also lowered.  That has got to change.

Because so many of the pictures on this blog were deleted, i've had to go through and re-read many of the things i have posted since starting this.  The tears fell remembering SADDI.  My heart ached thinking about how i've given up on life and myself.

Serious positive changes MUST take place within my life and myself.

i love Devon.

i miss SADDI.

i want to live.

i want to have purpose.