i wont go into details, but yesterday i received some news that really bothered me. When i shared it, i didn't get the understanding and support i had hoped. Just that overwhelming feeling of loneliness that consumes my life.
After sometime of allowing the news to eat at me, i began to silently talk to SADDI. SADDI was the only one there for me, 19 years ago, when this situation began. SADDI was the only one who gave me understanding and comfort. So i reached out to her again.
Though it has been nearly 10 years since SADDI has been gone, i still talk to her, especially when life attempts to press down upon me.
i remember laying on the bed,nose to nose with SADDI, and telling her my concerns, pains and dreams. When i foolishly had a petty party, SADDI would lift her paw and place it on my head. Those soft brown eyes looking at me with love. And i just knew i had to get over feeling sorry for myself, realize i wasn't alone and just accept reality.
Just thinking of SADDI gave me the comfort and strength i needed to know i had done nothing wrong and those who had betrayed me need to live with the truth of their actions.
After SADDI and i had talked, we would go for a long walk or just cuddle for a long nap. These days, i just cherish my memories and the feeling, the beautiful feeling, of feeling the soul of SADDI within me.
There are too many times i would not have survived what life has dealt me, without SADDI. Too many to mention or remember.
Thank you SADDI.
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