4 Years

Four years ago today, August 9, 2009, i kissed my beautiful little girl on the ear, whispered how much i love and need her, she raised her paw and placed it on my hand and then she was gone.   SADDI is my best friend.   SADDI is my soulmate.   SADDI, as well as Devon, is the love of my life.   SADDI picked me on May 10, 1006 and we shared 13.5 years together.   SADDI was with me during the biggest move in my life.  Protected me when i was abused and used.   Cared for me when i was sick.   Celebrated with me when Devon joined our family.   A day never passes that i am not overwhelmed with tears in missing SADDI.  An hour doesn't go by without a smile from thinking about her.   i am forever, deservingly so, carrying the guilt that i could not save her from the evils of cancer, she certainly did not deserve to suffer.  But SADDI was brave, confident and ensured that Devon and i were loved, as she also ensured that we continued to spoil her (we didn't need the reminder actually, but it was fun teasing her).   SADDI never complained, even on that last day as i laid with her waiting for Devon to return home.  We laid there for a couple of hours, where i just told her how much better my life was with her and thanking her for making me a better human.   SADDI kept her paw on my hand as she struggled to breathe.  She was so weak, but when Devon came through the door she wanted to get up to greet him, but i wouldn't let her and just had Devon hurry to us.   SADDI was more human than any human i have ever known.   i wish more people knew her and witnessed our beautiful love story.   Until the day i am reunited with SADDI at the Rainbow bridge, i will share our story and hopefully inspire more people to be like this amazing doggie.   i love you so very much SADDI.   i need us and i know, in your own way, you are still with me.   i feel you.   i feel your energy.   And often i even feel you laying against me.   Thank you SADDI for loving me when i couldn't even find reasons to love myself.