Seattle Waterfront

photo by ric berrong

There is a place, not on this soil, called the Rainbow bridge.   It is just a belief, but one that i hold closely within my heart and dreams.

The Rainbow bridge is a place where our beloved animal family members go when they are taken from us.   Taken far too soon.   It is believed this is where they wait for us until we finally depart our bodies on this earth.

The Rainbow bridge crosses over to a place where there is freedom from pain and age, and our animal family members are returned to their prime, healthy and happy.   They make new friends and share stories about the love they received from the humans in their earthly life.  Some are comforted by their new friends because their earthly life was cruel, sometimes never knowing the love others had received.

Today, i dream about crossing the Rainbow bridge, leaving behind this lonely earth and being greeted by the beautiful smile on my precious SADDI's face.   Feeling her pressing against my legs as she barks her welcoming to me.  If there is such a thing as forever, i will be holding SADDI that long.

30 years ago

... Impossible to believe, but 30 years ago today my precious Scruffy was taken from me. Scruffy, my very best friend during my school years, was so devoted to me and always knew how to make me smile ... which was often. When we moved into my Grandmothers house, our new neighbors, old friends, had found Scruffy but were about to take her to the pound. i begged my mom to let me have her and so began our friendship. About a year later, my mothers third husband was leaving us and loading everything he could into his truck. i took Scruffy next door and begged Arlene to watch over Scruffy and not allow my so-called step father to take her, as he had threatened. It was the longest day of my life worrying about Scruffy. As soon as i got home i was over joyed to find Scruffy waiting for me and we returned to our now empty house. The next few years were quite a struggle, i could not have survived without Scruffy. Scruffy always seemed to know when i was coming back from school and would stand on the screen door waiting for me. She could hear a block or so away and began her yelping cry. As soon as i walked into the house she would roll onto her back waiting for me to rub her belly, but she was so excited she would always pee a little. i often thought that Scruffy returned to me in the form of SADDI, they are so much alike. So loving. So loyal. So protective of me. So very much missed.   

4 Years

Four years ago today, August 9, 2009, i kissed my beautiful little girl on the ear, whispered how much i love and need her, she raised her paw and placed it on my hand and then she was gone.   SADDI is my best friend.   SADDI is my soulmate.   SADDI, as well as Devon, is the love of my life.   SADDI picked me on May 10, 1006 and we shared 13.5 years together.   SADDI was with me during the biggest move in my life.  Protected me when i was abused and used.   Cared for me when i was sick.   Celebrated with me when Devon joined our family.   A day never passes that i am not overwhelmed with tears in missing SADDI.  An hour doesn't go by without a smile from thinking about her.   i am forever, deservingly so, carrying the guilt that i could not save her from the evils of cancer, she certainly did not deserve to suffer.  But SADDI was brave, confident and ensured that Devon and i were loved, as she also ensured that we continued to spoil her (we didn't need the reminder actually, but it was fun teasing her).   SADDI never complained, even on that last day as i laid with her waiting for Devon to return home.  We laid there for a couple of hours, where i just told her how much better my life was with her and thanking her for making me a better human.   SADDI kept her paw on my hand as she struggled to breathe.  She was so weak, but when Devon came through the door she wanted to get up to greet him, but i wouldn't let her and just had Devon hurry to us.   SADDI was more human than any human i have ever known.   i wish more people knew her and witnessed our beautiful love story.   Until the day i am reunited with SADDI at the Rainbow bridge, i will share our story and hopefully inspire more people to be like this amazing doggie.   i love you so very much SADDI.   i need us and i know, in your own way, you are still with me.   i feel you.   i feel your energy.   And often i even feel you laying against me.   Thank you SADDI for loving me when i couldn't even find reasons to love myself.