My Pledge

i took a 30 day hiatus from the all too often negative cyber world to detox.  To cleanse my mind and soul of people who don't matter to my everyday life and childish hate directed at me because i'm not part of the 'us VS them' agenda.  Certainly, i wasn't happy about who i was becoming attempting to have a conversation with people who only use insults and lies trying to make their point.  Far too much time wasted.  i was also struggling with losing my very special squirrel friend.  i really don't have any friends and this lil squirrel, who i felt a connection to because of her disability and the way the other squirrels were so cruel to her, was often the only one i talked to during the day.  She trusted me.  And while the other squirrels run away when i opened the sliding door, she would always coming running to me.  When it was raining, she would wait under the shed, but when she saw me, she'd come running and sit just inside the house eating the treats i saved just for her.  Since she has been gone, i sit looking out the window at the shed, hoping she might come back.  The emptiness is overwhelming.  But i have felt this emptiness for over 8 years now, since SADDI was taken from me.  Someone else who made me feel as though i had a purpose in life.  Someone who needed me, but i actually needed even more.  i miss that feeling within my life. Within me.  i have known for sometime, my impact on life wont truly be felt until after i am gone (though i'm beginning to question that after this 30 day absence) ... and i am fine with that.  My mission will continue posting positive messages to inspire on the SAISARunlimited page, even though my audience is small.  It's not always easy to remain positive in today's world of toxic energy and people, the last thing i want to do is add to it.  Life is a celebration ... in honoring the memory of SADDI ... i need to be part of the inspiration.  What i feel inside myself, the emotions and thoughts i struggle with daily, will stay within me.  i've learned everything i see, think or feel doesn't need to be shared.   What matters to me is knowing, within myself, that am i part of the solution ... not part of the problem.   i am returning to devoting the remaining time of my life to being a messenger of a positive light ... hoping that light will stay on and thrive after i am gone.   2018 ... The Year of Kindness